bites and boats

trusting that I will date this later
is how I trust I will never
stop writing
even if I take a break or two to
live life off the page
my swolen body hides from mosquitos
in my air-conditioned fazenda room
perhaps some time out on the hammock
would do me well
but I can't bare another bite if I can help it

three weeks in this country below the equator
on the other America
Salvador was not my favorite
the in your face poverty bothered me
the guilt I would feel
the anger and desperation they felt
the responsibility put on me
to give give give
because I am a rich American
but I'm not rich and I don't have much
and their attacks, their physical pleas,
the violations of personal space and oh!
what a luxury to even have the concept of "personal space"

-at the end of the day I am
terribly uncomfortable
I am empty because I gave
I am empty because I gave nothing at all

my hand is sore from all the bites on my arms




We did finally get out of Salvador and found refuge in the Pantanal. But before we left the state of Bahia we took one more trip from the city to a little island off the coast called Morro Saô Paolo. To get to this haven of white beaches you must take a 2 hour catamaran boat. However, the travel agency we were working with (who also arranged our Pantanal itinerary) decided to put us on a smaller more intimate boat. Ilha Bella was her name.

It is interesting how two hours can feel timeless. Marked by the beauty of the swells as the city begins to dissapear behind them. The wonder of fish the size of dolphins flipping out and back into the water while you sit beside that special someone out in the middle of blue. Then blue becomes white as your head hangs over the boat's edge and you are found throwing up your breakfast. And the return trip was much of the same beauty and horror. Except this time my special someone and me were on the Ilha Bella II and she has quite a cloud of smoke emanating from her back end making fresh air into pollution. A series of sessions over the edge for me as Miles anchored my legs to the boat. It was on this ride that I experienced riding a boat, throwing up, and my upper body being completely immersed under water due to the activity of the sizable swells to our little intimate boat.

The boat ride was worth the trouble. The island was gorgeous. It is unfortunate that we had only around 24 hours to spend there. The water was less than 3 feet deep even half a mile from the beach. It was the stuff of postcards and travel brochures. In the morning small colorful cargo boats would be marrooned in the shallow waters as the tide went out. In the evening, after making the days delivery, the tide would rise allowing them passage.

We took our passage back to Salvador and the next morning we were on a plane to the wetlands of the Pantanal.