canada y'all

it may be too soon to tell what my fate is this year
but do think of me when you see water this week
save a prayer for me to not drown
when you are feeling the misfortune of summer and are finding itches upon your arms
think of me and rest assured there will be a mosquito party along the lines of this brown body
i will attempt to reserve myself this year from the lady up the road
but in the event that i will not be able to avoid the visit
have faith in me and give me strength to not attack her and her moose [scotch and milk] when she relays to me
that i am indeed brown
that i need to learn the western ways

yes think of me
for i think of you
everyday
all you white people
black people
brown people
inbetween people
all still figuring out these western ways

but at least you can swim

nyc not my home anymore

from a high rise
inbetween texts to friends
appeasing hellos
summer heat
i think of him

i think i'm sad
this city misses no one

but he said at a brooklyn bar diguising itself as manhattan
these streets feel my absence

lies i say!

these streets have too much company
much too much for this little girl and her little words
so expensive for my holy habits
my economical belly
my jwb liver
my hippy ways
impatience sways

the city goes on
it misses me not
i'm sad
because i don't mind
i am not bothered
i do not miss this city at all

i would not trade a day spent in this city's blanket
i would not trade the moment when it was decided
it was time to leave

or return for that matter
because as i said we are just running in circles
we come back home
always coming home for the answers
always running back into those familiar doors
branded with your mark

no i miss this city not
the magic of every street corner
the tales heard from one city block
my pores opening as i take on yet another flight of stairs
another squeezed subway ride
another frown, don't talk to me
another paper, this world so wrong
another street fair, i'll take a 5 dollar lemonade sure!


it wouldn't be that bad
it's not that bad
but i needed you
i missed you

yelled at miles once while he tried waking me up
snapped: don't ever interupt me while i'm visiting my friends and family

i don't have to sleep as much anymore
i never want to miss out on you again

so give me all your crazy
you keep affirming me everyday

point me to home

time words work you and ms joplin?

There are not enough hours in the day

I want to see the whole world laugh at the same time

Drink some wine

Blink out some tears for all the kismets stuck in traffic

Regale my unwavering soul

Hand- pick my thoughts

Want to swim in your mouth

Then let you spit me out

I want you to see me pout

Want to see you spit words upon words

Pulling out feeling upon feeling

Letter by letter tongue twisting my thighs

Barrel collecting my eyes

Darting out the ocean

I’m free

Just another word for nothing left to lose she says

But I’m worried that time

Time won’t slow down for me

Got all these things to say got shit to poop

Got more chicken for your soup and I type cause it looks like I’m working

And I am working

Just not for her

For my sanity

For my entertainment

Making wet wishes to this computer screen

Got glassy eyes for that spot on your neck right below your ear

And I’m swerving in this office chair

While I vomit this on a word document

Getting in predicaments I want to be in

Accidents I believe in

Spontaneity as a consistency

Pull me closer

I’ll take you too

And you and you

And you

And time is what you make of it

Time is a figment of your imagination

A fraction of a day

Time is a beauty, an ugly reality

The beast that hovers over you when you could have been so much more

The blanket that validates you when you realize how far you’ve come

A ticker tape stuck on you

As she says: just another word for nothing left to lose

It’s there whether you’re paying attention or not

Permanent like your soul

Imagination, speculation, threatening, and liberating

All of the above

No need to prove just move with it

Move into it

It’ll reveal out of necessity

::::come out and play::::

who's in, who's out?
who's there? who's square?
road trip? plane trip?
on your couch? in your fridge?
gotta smile? gotta drink?
like your style
don't think
let's go

:::::::::::::ITINERARY:::::::::::::

L O S A N G E L E S

i'm here already. if you live here, we should already be hanging out. if we haven't, that's really lame.

S A N F R A N C I S C O

july 29.30.31 : friday.saturday.sunday

august 5.6.7 : friday.saturday.sunday

N E W Y O R K C I T Y

august 16-21 : tuesday red-eye into wednesday---sunday

C A N A D A

august 22-28 : monday-sunday

*and just like that, she's back on the 29th off a plane from nyc and back to work on the 30th.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

come out and play.
stop pretending.

red rooster crows

you gave me 366 reasons to stay

but, man, i had to leave carmine

it’s been more than 100 days

and you’re still lingering on my mind

always imagined linda lou and benny boy

meeting up at a bar somewhere on the eastside

catching up on old times, still searching for their mexico

still chasing down their dreams, hand in hand as they go

but that’s no way of dying

so they lose themselves in a dance

while calico lady sits in the back writing

inspiration for her, for them one last chance

i close my eyes and sing a porch song

only to find i’m the only one in attendance

these days are walking along

but i never forgot how you took my independence

yes indeedy, good-bye to carmine

taking all those memories on my mind

all those melodies

on the road to california for company

joni in the front seat

rooster in the back

humming along to each track

saw dust is starting to settle

as your lips hit that amplified metal

i'm staying in this space for one more round

just one

locked into that sweet sound

dancing around

freedom bound

perfect me

never said i was perfect
i'm sick of looking at your face
i wanna puke on your feelings
and have no justification for it

wanna be hard and difficult
shrivel up and flip you off
fuck your reasons, i could give a shit
i've been fucking them up and down the walls of graffiti
where memories of us used to hang for months now
like hanging out laughing
fucking residue of a good time, i stomp on that crap
who gives a shit about good times
what is now is now

yes to jealousy and bats to knees
dragging her face across the sidewalk
pulling her out of her skin
i spit at the thought of "let's talk"
don't give a fuck about being the bigger man
i'm a woman
i'm a human
the closer i am to knowing my shit
is the quicker i can fuck up yours
so yeah, i hurt sometimes
so what?
fuck the differences
fuck being polite

fuck it all
slap me
punch me
scare me
maybe i'll flinch
but i'll definately be smiling
maybe i'll walk away crying
but i'll walk with myself
because i don't need you

nope, not you

another
asshole
down

last call for the asshole ball

so we began to dance
another spark, another flare
you and me in our trance
remember when we left nothing to spare

quick and fast we were going
the fire was lit
roll dawgs as it were
all attached at the hip

then there was no phone call, just a text then press send
a dance and a hug, an expression of love
then tell me you're mad at me just for being a friend

startled and hurt
once open and real
now proving to be
a slap on the hand, just a temporary thrill

30 days and counting
a keeper it was official, remember that part?
got fireworks and july
but i got june in my heart

an everyday smile, an 8 am call
a nighttime cap always about back in the days
making up stories we did
just for a laugh, it was the craze

but now your stories are changing
still bullshit at best
but it isn't funny anymore
now look at this mess

shame on your hypocrisy
you know what i'm talking about
i'm eating your shame for dinner
and spitting out the bones of doubt

you lost your balls some where along the way
your manners must be holding hands with them
cause it was my couch you slept on
and my mama's food you feasted on
it was my feelings and time you were impinging on
it was my thoughts and words you were binging on
it was my family pictures you were in on
it was my pop's laugh you were laughing on
it was my man's girl you were chillin' on
it was my heart's beat you were talking on
my life you were sitting in on
and you have no decency to be a man
you have no cohones to look me in the eye and take a stand
for whatever the fuck this shit is all about
give me something, shout it out
cause the shit your claiming is without a doubt bullshit
and even if you keep saying it over and over again
it doesn't make it true

so fine, you quit this crew
cool
just forgot we were still in high school
forgot some people don't know how to walk the walk
even though they can talk a good talk

someday you'll know how you fucked me over on this one
and then the day after that you'll realize how you really only fucked yourself
cause you just got a little closer to being a coward
all i am is a girl who happened to make a new friend
the best way i know how, with honesty, with belief in you
and all you are is an asshole

mm. maybe not entirely. but certainly in this scene
you proved yourself to be a big one
be proud

gnarly fucker